I’ve done a lot of wrong in my life. And I still do wrong every day… today it’s being held against me hard… I messed up. It may not be a big deal to most of you but man is it eating at me tonight. As I lay my head down to sleep, my heart feels heavy and I can’t breath that well. I’ve been kind of freaking out about something and a few minutes ago it was a joke between people, but I’m honestly freaking out and am currently crying about it. I tend to think too hard about a lot of things. It’s kind of the way I am. I try not to but it just usually ends up happening. I’m trying to watch my favorite movie but it’s not even helping. I just wish certain things never happened. Because if they didn’t. I wouldn’t be worried about it right now. I’d be fine. Have you ever thought about a bad situation you were in? Or like a certain person you regret dating? That feeling you get and you try and shake off the feeling? Thinking it’ll go away when you shake? I don’t like feeling dumb… no one does. It leaves me feeling almost empty. I don’t like making mistakes either again, no one does. I feel like I may have gotten too close to someone and have gotten too dependent and I feel pretty ridiculous waiting for them to text back… I feel stupid and like a burden. But man do I need a friend right now. One who will give me righteous advice and look out for my well being and tell me that all these insecurities are wrong and I need to stop. I’m having a rough night and I’m about to confide I someone I shouldn’t be confiding in…. Lord help me…
There was a preaching I listened to.. they said you can’t rebuke what entertains you….. What entertains me seems pretty comforting right now.
True friends…. where ya at??
A true friend will be your candle in the dark, your hope when it’s gone and takes away your pain when it hurts.