Why is it that us as humans cannot control our feelings? I’m like seriously annoyed with myself that I have generated feelings that can and potentially have messed things up. I’m being mentally beaten down again and I just don’t know if I can handle it. I’m exhausted and I’ve been overthinking lately and I just want to be flat out completely honest with this person but I can’t. I was advised not to. I find it so dumb that I can’t control how I feel about someone. If I didn’t have feelings whatsoever, everything would be fine. It’d be perfect go jolly. I’m honestly just thinking about turning my feelings off and just going with the flow. But I have found that determination in me yet. I hope I find it soon because it’s making all these things so complicated. My best friend is weired out & now I feel like she doesn’t wanna be around me and I can’t chill with my new bro because of it. Lord Jesus have mercy on me. I need to learn to just focus on God right now and nothing else. You know what, that’s what I’m gonna do is switch those feelings off or not even think about from now on. So we’re good, we’re Gucci.

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